The One Thing Women Struggle With

Have you tried goal setting in the past and failed spectacularly? Wondering if it was just you not being able to stick to a plan? Well, I want to talk about the one thing that I see women struggle with the most when it comes to goal setting - and that’s trying to make a super masculine focused approach to goal setting fit with our unique and diverse lives.

I've always found goal-setting and visioning work to be super masculine focused. I mean, it's all about winning, achieving, productivity, and climbing up the proverbial ladder. I always struggled myself making those approaches try to work for my life. But I always thought something was missing.

I'd follow the structure like it was written down (you know the one-size-fits-all approach). Using masculine driven values to try to dream up what I wanted in life. And there was always such a big block to thinking big for my life because it was so one sided. This never seemed to be an issue for my partners or male friends. They never had a problem identifying those large, crazy goals for their life.

This masculine focused approach leads to women playing smaller in their lives. I know this because I always played smaller. I remember wanting to think big. Oh yes, so much bigger from the life. But my brain would get in the way and say there was no way I could achieve that crazy dream. I thought that big hairy audacious goal that deep down I really wanted, wasn't meant for me. I just didn’t have a clue how to achieve it, and didn’t know how to get support in my life to do things differently. 

So there I was, staring at a too-small goal for my life and figuring out why I lacked motivation to really go after it. And you know why? It's because it wasn't my real goal for my life. It wasn't what I really wanted because the process didn’t support my in how to think bigger for my life, to realize that I was the one putting myself in that too small box.

I remember the exact moment I realized this key struggle. I was going through a goal setting exercise and was so proud of what I’d come up with. I was so excited to share my goals with my husband. But when I did he simply said, “You’re not thinking big enough.” So I went back and tried again. And my husband said once again, “You need to think bigger.” My mind was just blown because I realize in that moment how I’d been doing this my entire life. Holding myself back secretly sabotaging my own happiness by not believing in myself and not just f****** going for it.

So I worked to re-engineer the process to make it more accessible and reachable for women. To really focus on the missing pieces that would support woman in going for it in their lives. It involves a lot of love and support, and a no-BS approach when I see other women playing too small. My process celebrates the uniqueness of each of us, and incorporates custom designed rituals to support a vision tailored for each person.

My mission is to help other women think bigger for their lives, for their happiness, for their joy. Because damn it we deserve it. We deserve other women cheering us on.

I’d love to hear what your biggest struggle has been when it comes to goal setting and living a life more aligned.

Wishing you love & magic.

~ Erica